REVERSE RESOLUTION FOR 2025!! (1 min read)

As we enter a new year, many of us instinctively jot down ambitious resolutions and endless to-do lists. While these lists offer direction, they can often become overwhelming and unsustainable.

Over the years, I have listed things like waking up at 5 a.m., having more prayer time, losing weight, publishing my book, and saving all the stray dogs in the world!

But let’s face it—most of us return to our grinds by mid-year and then wonder if making a list ever works.

How about leaving behind our To-Do List that looks more like a superhero training manual than realistic goals to focus on a Not-To-Do List?

A Not-To-Do List isn’t about being lazy or abandoning goals—it’s about being strategic and identifying little habits that quietly steal our time, energy, and sanity. It's a strategy of intentional elimination rather than mindless addition.

Perhaps, asking myself a simple question can help - What activities consumed my time but added little value?

Maybe it's excessive social media scrolling? Is it saying yes to every request, or overcommitting to projects out of guilt or fear of missing out?

Now, how about this list?

I will not say yes to every call, every invite, every social engagement nor commit out of obligation.

I will not sacrifice rest for productivity

I will not check my phone first thing in the morning or read emails in bed at midnight.

What's the difference? Just the addition of Not? Self-care with sass? A new stunt?

The beauty of this list is that it frees up space—mentally, emotionally, and physically. It removes unnecessary clutter creating room for what truly matters.

Meaningful work, deeper relationships, and personal growth.  It helps us set boundaries, teaches us to protect our priorities and say no without guilt.

This isn’t about doing less for the sake of laziness; by declaring what I won’t do, I am permitting myself to focus on what truly matters. Spending time with family, pursuing a passion, or simply sitting on my veranda staring at the sky. 

And, the best part?

A Not-To-Do List is way easier to stick to than a To-Do List. After all, not doing something requires little effort.

Didn’t scroll through social media until my thumb was cramped. Congratulations, I just nailed my Not-To-Do List!

So, as we step into the New Year, let go of unrealistic expectations and try this reverse resolution.

 A Not-To-Do List - who knows, 31.12.25 may surprise us at how much more intentional and fulfilling our year turned out to be.

Sometimes joy and fulfilment aren’t in doing more—it’s doing less but on purpose.

HAPPY NEW YEAR MY BEAUTIFUL WORLD!!

Micro Novelties - 1 min read

Growth comes from transformation, and transformation is a result of habits.  

Simple actions combined with existing routines can become powerful change agents. I call these acts micro novelties of change.

Consider this: reading about 10 pages daily, equals a 300-page book in a month. Walking 15 minutes every morning means walking 90 hours in one year. The cumulative effect of these small actions is phenomenal.

Micro habits require very little to begin but consistency is key. There’s no need for extra time or a complete shift of lifestyle. A gradual steady move towards the goal is important.

So, what kinds of micro-habits can we incorporate into our lives?

I started by introducing what I like to call "micro-novelties"1into my schedule. Small, easy changes that brought fresh perspectives and a spark of excitement to my days.

The Method Behind Novelty

Our brains desire novelty. Trying new things releases dopamine, the "feel-good" neurotransmitter. It boosts creativity, enhances problem-solving skills, and engages us more with life.

And the best part, these micro-novelties can be as simple as: 

•         Reading something we don’t usually read.
•         Trying a new recipe.
•         Striking up a conversation on an offbeat topic.

Ideate your Micro-Novelties

Think about what excites you and heightens your curiosity. A new hobby, visiting a new place or unearthing a hidden skill. Choose activities that align with your interests and values. It makes the experience meaningful and enjoyable. 

Even tiny changes can create a huge momentum. The power of small actions is in their accessibility and ease of execution.

Here are some of my incremental actions that I embraced and they are working!  

My focus, and energy levels have improved. My anxiety has reduced and my sleep scores are better. I am living purposefully and getting more done at the same time available. 

1.  Stretch – Hydrate – Meditate

I begin each morning with 5 minutes of stretching followed by "methi water"2 and prayer. 

2.  10-minute walk - any time

I take that walk either while we feed our community dogs or at an opportune time. 

3.  Gratitude

I note things I am grateful for and fill a Gratitude Box at my workstation. 

4.  Trade what’s futile

Replace outdated practices with something purposeful. I have exchanged mindless scrolling with informative content. 

5.   No method in madness

I take a good 15 minutes each day to tidy up my personal spaces. I toggle between my office desk, wardrobe and my gadgets. 

6.  Get moving – Exercise

I began by stretching.  I have graduated to 6.5 kms of stationary biking and freehand exercises daily. 

"What small actions could I take daily to achieve a larger goal?”  Try reflecting on this question to help you choose your potential micro-habits!

Consistency is what transforms average into excellence! 

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[1] I came across a company on LinkedIn and the internet by this name. Decided to adopt the term.

[2] Fenugreek seed water – it works for my sluggish metabolism. Please check with your Physician about what works for you.

Acknowledgements: 

Concept - While writing this blog, I was greatly influenced by the book “Atomic Habits” by James Clear and “The Purpose Driven Life” by Rick Warren

Images – Google Library

HAPPY WOMEN'S DAY 2024 !! (1 min read)

Empowered women understand that it's not about attitude. It is about setting standards that reflect their worth. They capture your attention and inspire you through their subtlety and authenticity.

An authentic woman outshines all else; needing no veneer to appease those around them. Instead, they embrace and exhibit their true selves.

Here are my favourites about authentic women:

1.     They are respectful regardless of who they interact with. Never the loudest in the room or the one dressed in the most expensive attire, but they radiate elegance.

2.     They are great listeners, present in the conversation and attentive. They think before responding and never interrupt anyone mid-sentence. They speak to engage and understand and not to gather information.

3.     They are gracious, seeking kindness and gratitude towards leaving a lasting impression.

4.     They embrace vulnerability and do not see it as a sign of weakness. They accept their flaws and are open about their struggles. They never hide behind a mask of perfection; thus making them human, relatable, and unforgettable.

5.     They stand firm in their principles. And understand that their words and actions are a reflection of themselves. Integrity is the most attractive quality anyone can own.

6.     They are learners who seek to expand their knowledge and worldview. What sets them apart is how they use this awareness. They don’t accumulate but apply them in their circle of influence.

 If there is one thing I wish to do, it is to embrace authenticity. Because at the end of the day; it’s not about how much resources I have access to or how appealing I may look; it’s about the person I am - that will enable change and add towards a better tomorrow.

Slow down - 1 minute read

 

I am no social butterfly. But my zest for life and living is often disproportionate to my physical capacity. I can be rather impatient and very restless when am off the move! So my sudden sentence of immobilization, when I injured my ankle exasperated me. 

Much of my redemption came in this canine-shaped disguise right under my nose. Or rather curled up at my foot! I counted every single day and hour, as he kept to his routine with clockwork precision.

No matter when you sleep, 530 am is the wake-up alarm. He cannot count but knows exactly how many Marie biscuits he will get with our morning tea. Including the last piece from mine! Sleeping after morning tea till lunchtime is never compromised. With an occasional gleam of excitement if a poor fly swooped down anywhere close to him. Or if there's someone new at the door.

He is always armed with boundless energy and an arsenal of wet-nose nudges. Spike brought laughter and lit up my otherwise gloomy days. 

A gentle lick on the hand and his comforting body weight next to mine were assuring. The deep sigh as he stared at me with a wrinkled forehead, as though the worries of the Universe had landed over him. It all added towards a pleasant recovery.

The world felt brighter and hopeful, with his unwavering affection. Though I remained confined longer than I liked; I was grateful to learn how to slow down. 

Disappointments often lead to unexpected blessings. 

And I am so waiting for mine!

“Slow down, breathe, and take in the peace that surrounds you.”

Strength in Adversity (1 min read)

Sometimes, in the middle of nowhere comes a setback. And in it, we often find a deep sense of meaning and direction. The struggle becomes a medium for growth. It is a test of resilience and often redefines our goals. Setbacks are never roadblocks but new roadmaps. They are like transformative stepping stones to something more purposeful and fulfilling.

Landing on my ankle on the first weekend of the year wasn't exactly what I expected, yet it happened! Was I (rather am I) upset? Frustrated and disappointed? Most certainly yes! There was much planned and much to look forward to. A brand new year for work, studies and family responsibilities, yet here I am plastered and immobilized.

To be able to accept disappointment takes courage. It involves a shift in perspective and mindset. Instead of dwelling on what didn't go as planned, consider it an opportunity. Reflect on the experience and identify the lesson. It will help in persisting with greater resilience towards a better future.

Sitting on my bed, looking at my slightly neglected balcony garden I recalled some of the terms I learnt as a container gardener. 

Look forward to sharing more of my experiences in the coming weeks.

“Everything that slows us down and forces patience, everything that sets us back into the slow circles of nature, is a help...”

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Disabling Ableism - 1 min read

 "What went wrong with you?”

And that is how strangers often start a conversation with me. How do I usually respond? With a broad smile and “It’s a long story.”

There is a type of discrimination that goes unnoticed – ableism. Though I vaguely recognized the term I never paid attention to its meaning. It is a bias – a presumption, and discrimination towards people living with disabilities. It suggests that “typical abilities” are superior and marginalize individuals with disabilities; limiting access to certain rights and basic human needs.

 Ableism is often overlooked and goes unchallenged because of its deep-rootedness. These days it may not appear in regular conversations or actions but surfaces with subtle messages of “no way, do not include”, “don’t mind, but not you”; and “stay in the background please, the stage is not yours”. 

 

When we unpack the word “disability” it immediately brings to mind people with noticeable

physical conditions. It is a condition that causes difficulty for a person to do certain activities or have equitable access in society. The sentiment that the disabled deserve pity but need not be seen or heard makes disability a bad thing. It is something to be set right for someone to be acceptable.

 

As a child, people stared at me as though I was an alien. Some pitied me while others had grave concerns about my future. A harmless jibe, often unintentional, that dismisses someone with a disability is an obvious form of ableism. Insensitive and unkind, ableism begins with the failure to acknowledge that the disabled exist regardless of their condition.

 

Here are the kinds of ableism I have experienced. The list is not exhaustive, but it captures the basics.

 

1. I was conditioned to believe that people with disabilities have less value and worth

 

2. While a cure or relief from pain would have been awesome, constantly assuming that I need to be “healed” or “can overcome” was and is unnecessary.

 

3. Suggesting that I am “inspirational” for handling routine activities and daily tasks.

 

4. Speculating about my “limited” life and presuming I can’t do much.

 

5. Suggesting that I am “less normal” and “less healthy”!!

 

6. Being asked extremely "intrusive questions" about my personal life.

 

7. Letting my crooked foot decide my "professional competence."

 

Some of us need adjustments and accommodation in everyday life; but here’s something to consider- if wearing glasses, braces, and even false eyelashes is deemed acceptable; normalize funny shoes and hearing aids. 

 

For most of us living with a disability, the challenge itself has far fewer consequences on the quality of our lives than all the discrimination we face. Pitying and making assumptions about our lives and abilities won’t help. Challenging the assumptions can help us replace them with inclusivity, acceptance, and respect.

 

So recognize that people with disabilities are, in fact, people — equal to nondisabled people in every way and worthy of the same respect. This makes a good first step toward preventing ableism. It may sound too basic but the main factor driving ableism is the thought that people with disabilities are somehow “less.”

 

Although ableism is woven into the fabric of society, it’s possible to mend the pattern and create a more inclusive future. Ableism must be ended by calling it out just like other forms of discrimination. Voice your concerns and challenge them instead of merely trying to fix the disabled.

 Images are sourced from Google and are subject to copyright.

Tugging the World Around : 1 min read

Sir Arthur Conan Doyle once said: “The little things are infinitely the most important.”

A significant advantage of travel is experiencing books come alive. On our trip to Lakshwadeep in 2018, I witnessed the strength of Tugboats that I had only read about.

Tugboats1 are small boats designed to guide large ships and manoeuvre them towards the port by pulling and pushing the vessels in position.2 Their double-powered engines create huge torque to run the propellers and generate massive pulling power. 

Large ships can sail in deep waters but struggle in the shallow, unable to stop, slow down or turn as the water is insufficient to facilitate quick movement of the rudders. 

At this point the tugboat, small, potent and just enough swirls into action, powerfully taking control.

Often many of us may feel like the small tugboat; always pushing or pulling a greater cause.

What crosses our minds in those times? Do we feel unworthy or not enough? 

Away from the depths of the sea, saturated in shallow waters, are we tugboats?

Tugboats may look unassuming but are confident of their assignment. While ships set sail into the high seas, remember the tugboats wait their turn to manoeuvre them into their designated berths at ports. Without them, the ships cannot anchor, break the momentum, or move out from the shallow.

The insignificant is often the most impactful in moving the world around.