Spike - The Runaway Pup! Our Paw-fect Pet : 2 min read

 

"I think dogs are the most amazing creatures; they give unconditional love. For me, they are the role model for being alive."

As a family getting a puppy has a hilarious backdrop. When Sam wanted a sibling, we were hesitant. So, he almost settled for a pup. Much to his happiness, we decided “the sibling would grow up, a puppy would not.”

Our baby boy

Although we all love large breeds, we also have our individual preferences. The only undisputed favourite being our local strays. The limited space of our apartment, coupled with our busy schedules, were perfect conditions to give one of them home.

While we weighed the options several times, we were not quite prepared. So, we spent a year connecting with dog families and not dog owners. After extensive research and discussions, we were ready to bring our little boy home. Determined to house a homeless/rescue baby, we knew adoption was the most loving option.^[1] “You can't buy happiness, but you can rescue it.”

My school junior connected me to her dog’s groomer. He told me that a mother had abandoned her two-month-old pups. Just two had survived, so I could take one. The boy, he said, keeps running away all across the street. Done! He was coming home.

Second day at home.

The excitement was palpable as we prepared the home in different ways. Armed with basic information and still very inexperienced, we welcomed our new family member.

Spike came home on a Friday evening. He arrived in a grocery bag. All that was visible were his floppy ears and tiny face. He looked puzzled, timid, and drowsy, yet a distinct twinkle in his eyes lit up our living room.

May I share your biscuit please

“Dogs are miracles with paws”. With all that transpired at home over the last nine months, we are more than blessed to have him. Sometimes we ponder, did we save him? Or did he rescue us?

Stay with me as I time travel to document his first year with us. I promise it will be fun!

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[1] https://goodnesspetfood.com/dog-breeding-in-india/

Challenged for Change - Part 2 : 3 min read

The Survival P.A.C.K

PERSPECTIVE - APPROACH - CONVICTION - KNOWLEDGE

My thought process needed a tweak from operating in absolute terms. That said, I also understood from where this came. A practising Christian, the middle path meant compromise and, grey was unacceptable. These terms were sacrosanct and ingrained in my psyche. What I failed to comprehend was their application.

Balanced thinking is about seeing facts and staying focused. It is learning to see the shades of grey in life without compromising on areas that call for black or white views. In most cases, understanding shades of grey helps not only to navigate the self but also to accept others.

Grey can be unexciting because thinking in extremes has its thrill. Even if you protest that you don’t want drama as I did. The adrenaline rush it creates can be a fixation without you even knowing it. Thinking in the middle helps in better decision making. In the long term, it is a far more exciting prospect rather than believing “all the world’s a stage.”

I needed help but hesitated. It could prove that I was wrong or weak. Worse still, one might have thought I was unhappy. While neither was true, the paranoia was because of my past. An infliction on the body is visible but mental wounds remain unseen. Thus, untreated. If you break an arm, you will not ignore it or put off treatment. It is important to treat mental and emotional health issues.

As a God-fearing person, it would be natural to turn to Spiritual leaders. I will be honest here; the fear of judgement was very high. This got reiterated when a leader scolded me for being on medication for anxiety.

The next choice would be psychologists and therapists. Being in uncharted territory, I was following a known therapist to get a pulse of such treatments. The experience was disastrous. It was so bad that I started hating every word of psychology.

The third route I tried was extensive reading, self-study, and online resources. I was always keen on higher education. Investing time in reading reignited my desire to study. An unexpected opportunity allowed me to enroll on a distance programme in theology.

At the orientation session, some of the first lessons had nothing to do with the Bible. Neither the Gospel nor God. We learnt cognitive behaviour, lateral thinking, and psychometrics. The classes felt like I was sitting in one of my corporate offsite programmes.

It began; the seed for change had been sown. I felt positively challenged and had a world of possibilities bubbling within.

Images sourced from Google and are subject to copyright. I do not own them.

Challenged For Change : Part 1 : 2 min read

 

“To improve is to change; to be perfect is to change often.” Winston Churchill

A few years back, I got diagnosed with general anxiety due to PTSD (post-trauma stress disorder). I was not only in the lowest pit of my health but well-being too.

One of the most critical reasons for feeling knocked down was my heart first approach. And, life, in general, was almost always led by emotions.

"That was how I had always been for forty years of my life. I can't be otherwise! That won't be me!"

I had two options. To accept the challenge and change my modus operandi OR retreat into my shell and continue to suffer.

Each time I tried to reason my established behaviour, I failed but held on. I was getting sucked into a whirlpool and falling deep into an abyss. When I decided to try and change, I was CHALLENGED. I accepted.

1. I confronted my "belief system"* to embrace a more balanced thought process.

2. Tweaked my approach from 'I cannot change' to ' I cannot change others'.

3. Let go of things beyond my control.

4. I invested in a circle of influences. Restarted old habits like reading and enrolled for a postgraduate degree. Embraced new-age resources like e-learning.

I am a work in progress. Today I can say with certainty that because the situation challenged me, I changed for good.

Stay tuned as I share my journey in the next segment😊

*- I say belief system as my ways were quite sacrosanct and inviolable to me.

Images sourced from Google and are subject to copyright. I do not own them.

What to Believe?

 

The arrival of the pandemic found me facing different queries from a wide range of people. It included the God-fearing, the believer, the ritualistic and the atheist.

While I will not contest the premise of my faith, I will discuss the rationale for my belief. There were two genuine questions, for both of them, I to turn to the Bible.

 1.  If there is a God who is all-powerful, why are believers in God waiting for the vaccine?

2.  If I have faith in God and His powers, why do I need the vaccine or the precautions? God can protect us miraculously.

The ministry of Jesus was for about three years and there are approximately 37 recorded miracles in the Bible. Scope for varied situations in the first-century era was limited. Life was simple. It seems the incidents are irrelevant today, leaving our questions unsolved. Yet, Jesus left us with answers that hold well through all the complexities of this very day and age.

By Faith Alone

1. The woman with the issue of blood - was healed only by touching the hem of his garment.[1] 

2. Peter, James and John obeyed Jesus and set out their nets again to catch fish, even after trying the entire night. The reward for their faith came in the form of a huge catch.[2]

3. The man with a withered hand at the synagogue got healed. He trusted Jesus, despite all odds and God honoured his faith.[3] 

What do they reveal? 

        At times faith like a mustard seed is enough to bring forth great results.[4]

Through a medium

1. The instance of Jesus turning water into wine - He chose to fill the pitchers with water. [5]

2. The blind man Jesus healed using spit and mud.[6] Was it then prophetic, that millions of medicines would get invented in the centuries to follow? For we know, all knowledge comes from God.[7]

3. Jesus feeds the multitude but looks for food before He multiplied the little boy's bread and fish.[8]

What is the significance? 

        At times to comprehend God's glory, we may need a medium.

Acts and instances of direct intervention   

    1. Jesus raised Lazarus from the dead by calling out his name.[9] 

2. He commanded the wind and the waves to calm the storm.[10]

3. In the region of the Gerasenes, Jesus rebuked the impure spirit to leave the man who was bound by it.[11]

       What is the relevance? 

God can raise the dead, control nature and He rules over the power of darkness and light. He shines His glory in our impossible circumstances. We must learn to wait upon His timing.

       God works amongst all men

1. When Jesus enters Decapolis after passing through Sidon, some people brought before him a deaf man and begged Him to place his hand on the man. The text does not specify that the man was a gentile, but the Gospel of Mark states that he lived in the gentile Decapolis region.  He also heals the daughter of a Syro-Phoenician woman. She asks Jesus about whether his mission extends to the gentiles.[12]

2. Jesus offered to go to the house and heal the Roman Centurion’s servant[13]. However, he chose to depend on Jesus' word of authority. The servant got healed that very day. 

3. When Jesus withdrew to the region of Tyre and Sidon; a Canaanite woman from nearby came to him. She requested for the deliverance of her demon-possessed daughter. Seeing her faith, Jesus granted her request and healed the daughter.

    What was the reason? 

    God is no respecter of person. He came for every nationality, race, tribe and religion. John 3:16 says that “God so loved the world” NOT God so loved “certain people”.

    For my non-believing friends, I would say, give God a try before you reject Him. He is the source of all knowledge and makes everything perfect in His plan. He can remove this pandemic like He calmed the storm. 

    Maybe He wants to work through the vaccine and medication to reveal His glory. Yet through it all, He wants us to have faith like the woman who touched the hem of His garment. And yes, His healing will come for all nations and all man.

    To my believer friends, who are in doubt, God and medical science work in collaboration, not competition. Do not refuse, reject or disrespect the knowledge and resources of this world. The vaccine, the medication and the precautions are essential tools of God. Everything comes from Him and the best assurance for us is the Word of God.

May you be blessed!

Psalm 111:10  “The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom;...”

Proverbs 1:7  “The fear of the LORD is the beginning of knowledge, But fools despise wisdom and instruction.”

Proverbs 9:10  “The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom And the knowledge of the Holy One is understanding.”

 

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[1] Matthew 9:20–22, Mark 5:25–34, Luke 8:43–48

[2] Matthew 4:18–22; Mark 1:16–20; Luke 5:2–11; John 1:40–42

[3] Matthew 12:9-13, Mark 3:1-6, and Luke 6:6-11

[4] Matthew 17:20

[5]John 2:1–11

[6] John 9:6

[7] Daniel 2:20

[8] Matthew 14:13-21, Luke 9:10-17, John 6:5-15

[9] John 11:38-44

[10] Matthew 8:23–27, Mark 4:35–41, and Luke 8:22–25

[11] Matthew 8:28-34; Mark 5:1-20

[12] Non-Jewish people were called gentiles

[13] Romans did not follow the faith of Jesus

MEMORIES : 2 min read

 

The most bountiful riches live in our brain, memories.

             If we reflect on what life is all about, we can say with ease that part of life rests on memories. We save all the significant and joyful events that take place in our lives. We also remember the saddest and worst instants. Research says that the brain is the most powerful organ of the human body. And as part of the brain memory is a crucial section of it.

            Memories compose our being, every day we follow what we discover. I suppose memory is one of the safest aspects of our life. It goes with us when we die, we take nothing with us that we have now. Happy moments are like re-living them and feeling the delight we felt at the moment. Sad ones pain, us but we try to remain positive even if it brings negative feelings. The past is best left alone because it no longer exists. Yet, it is good that we own our memories. Things I want to engrave, or the things I want to forget, will leave traces in my mind. Recollection can ache or bring joy. Memory is like putting together the puzzle pieces of previous experiences. It is the core of the soul — like the wick in a candle without which it cannot give light.

             Can you imagine the splendour of memories? Nothing can touch the past except for memories. Painful recollections make us grow, happy memories help us bloom. When memories are gone, we become a newborn baby. Memories bring us every expression that humans have. I am, happy, to have my memories - the good, the bad and the ugly.

(Images sourced from Google and are subject to copyright. I do not own them.)

 

APPRECIATION : 4 min read

 “Threats to our standing in the eyes of others are remarkably potent biologically, almost as powerful as those to our very survival.” [1]   

            A positive reaction can brighten somebody’s day. So why not build people around us with joyful and humorous exchanges. Of course, without sounding phoney or insincere by saying things and not meaning them; timely and meaningful approval generates an aura of brilliance.

          The focus is to be authentic and distinctive and value something real about the person. There are several ways to articulate our admiration for others that strengthen relationships. Their infectious smile, bright personality, kind words and it can go on. It makes them feel supported, heard and valued.

          Here are some of my observations in my continuous journey of learning.

Being Precise and Personal

         Compliments that create effervescence are those that are exact points to the person. Instead of saying “you are amazing,” let us say why they’re amazing. If we like the painting someone made, “nice” isn’t enough. What is nice? Being specific works wonders.

     This reminds me of our first poetry assignment in Year 1 of college. We had written a critical analysis of “The Skylark”. The class had done a shoddy job and as for me, I went overboard using the word “beautiful”! Most of us got a dose of unforgettable reprimand. While handing over the answer script, my Professor, said “beautiful, beautiful, beautiful! For heaven’s sake please may, I also understand what you found beautiful?” It stuck so strong, these days I run word count to see if I repeated without qualifying.

         Mentioning something exact directs praise to the person and is genuine. There must be a reason to applaud and it’s nice to say it aloud. The more definite our effort is the more we will observe the worth of individuals. We generate a positive impression on the person.

           People love to hear their name. Verbalizing, in our unique style can be a way of presenting a kind word of feeling personal and special. We may consider starting by using their name. And also structuring words that revolve around the person.

      Names communicate recognition and a sense of adoration. Complimenting someone’s style seems shallow-observing their uniqueness can enliven the conversation. It goes beyond a smart shoe or a pretty necklace.

Acknowledging One's Effort and Impact

           

   When we appreciate someone it encourages and motivates both. If we want to thrill someone to their core, we must be observant. Admire their brave personality, kind-heart or gentleness rather than what they did. We can hear the difference between “you are so good” and “you gentle soul.” The word “good” describes an assortment of objects to aspects. Anyone and anything can be “good”, but only connecting the dots take it to another echelon.

            The key to appreciation is honesty and genuineness; period. No fluff and no lies. This also means picking the right moment rather than throwing them around.

            Most people love feeling appreciated; a positive word of their impact will mean the world. Yet, approving or articulating approbation for somebody seems awkward. Is it because we do not verbalise or communicate constructive sentiment? The core is to be unambiguous. Truthful and warm applause can be powerful in changing the way one perceives. Stating ‘you look great’ will have lesser influence than “I admire your lovely smile”.

           

           Gratitude, from the Latin word gratis is a feeling of appreciation. It is a positive response to kindness. Unfortunately, gracious admiration is a muscle we never felt enthused to build at all. We seem experienced in conveying negative emotions. At times, not identifying their scathing ramifications until much later; that is if we do at all. The aftermath of negative emotions, especially of devaluation is toxic and unfortunate. 

            Let us acknowledge; it is never too much to appreciate. In fact, it edifies gratitude, in our soul.

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[1] https://quotefancy.com/quote/1210830/Daniel-Goleman-Threats-to-our-standing-in-the-eyes-of-others-are-remarkably-potent

SHIFTING PARADIGMS THROUGH A PANDEMIC : PART 6 - 4 min read

Evolving Through Compassion

“If we have no peace, it is because we have forgotten that we belong to each other.” - Mother Teresa -

            All of us are looking for narratives; of how past catastrophic events have encouraged humans to act with remarkable compassion, courage and ingenuity. Can we foresee the same now; reverse the trend toward a meaner, lonelier, more polarized society?                 

  We are fortunate to be alive and breathing.  Interestingly, the threat of possibly needing a ventilator has sharpened our consciousness of the most advanced ventilator, our respiratory system. Late than never, we have accepted that we are experiencing a life-changing occurrence on a universal level. The only thing comparable in living history might be other pandemics like the Spanish flu and the world wars.

            We are wiser when we face the truth and progress practically but it's easy to retreat into denial or avoid accountability. The world has confronted and continues to do so with the Covid19 crisis with shutdowns unseen in living memory reminding us of some basic truths.

           As we watch the pandemic play out, we are compelled to adjust in trivial and monumental ways. However, we must also reflect on whether all should return to “normal” and think how our lives must alter, perhaps permanently.

    

        We live in a culture where we obsess on the “next” and “best”. While it has its positives, but constant up-gradation from methods of reorganising a closet, to the next best item to buy and general advancement at all times leads to low contentment. When someone offends us, or cease to fulfil our happiness, we walk away, looking for a better relationship. Our souls rarely settle, as our lives are planned, priced out, and seeking perfection. Sadly, we do not even notice the aching question behind our search for the next best thing. We desire fulfilment, rest, and joy that cannot be found in another person, place or project.

   

        The lockdown had reduced traffic and air pollution noticeably; lower attendance in offices and virtual ones at homes means spare commercial real estate that has freed up space for probable conversion into residences, educational institutes, clinics and playgrounds. Perhaps it is time to introspect whether construction of a shopping mall over a playground was a wise decision. Do we need more entertainment hubs to mushroom overnight by demolishing shelters and shanties?

         

   Colleges and universities today have expanded, turning accessible and affordable as distance learning is becoming commonplace. The on-campus college experience is transformed or eliminated; even if for the moment. Examinations requiring dozens, if not hundreds, of students to congregate are suspended and potentially discarded, as they discover possibilities online. An option of higher education for all from the remotest corners of the land looks promising.

   

        Circumstances have stimulated global acceleration of digitization; hence even if things return as before, voting by mail amongst many other activities may be one of the many new methods adopted, eliminating electoral expenses. Non-judgmental sick leave may become the norm where employers and coworkers will appreciate people staying home when they are ill. Universal health care, not just coverage will be a way forward. Telemedicine will hopefully be widespread as we concentrate on the expansion of local treatment centres and medical care facilities. Eradication of the virus is not the objective at this point. No one can wish the virus away; it won’t vanish - not before a successful vaccine is found. The goal is to slow it down and keep that curve level.

            Apart from individuals, we are directly responsible for like our household helps, chauffeur etc, we can find a family and send support. There are innumerous NGOs and Organizations who are doing it in a safe and structured manner. We may not be at ground zero currently but we can assist remotely. We can contact schools, maybe our own and pay someone's tuition fees, help someone restart a business or tweak it to something more doable. We can give the local vendor who has reopened his shop/business some extra amount when we buy his stuff. Leave the change for a taxi, auto-rickshaw etc. Pay someone's rent, or keep ration at a struggling family’s doorstep. Many organizations are assisting the needy. It could be difficult to entrust money to unknown sources but there are numerous connects who are involved with such activities and can be trusted.

           

        When we wish to create waves of change and positivity we find alternate paths. Let us hope and aspire sincerely that we all come out of the COVID nightmare not better but way better and allow ourselves to slow down. But then, choices are what we make - we either make efforts of coming out better or we stay back and worse we go back.

The choice is ours!